Asking for Support From Loved Ones
Some of you may not be feeling as supported as you usually do, especially since your stressors and needs are probably different than usual. In part, this may be because your friends, family, or partners don’t know exactly what support you need or how to provide it. So, I’d like to challenge you to:
- Consider what kind of support you need right now. Maybe it’s distraction, being (or not being) asked about the hospital, help with chores, doing something silly together, or something else
- And directly ask for it… Even though it may feel strange, our loved ones are often happy to get this insight because it helps them feel more effective!
- …without feeling guilty, weak, or as though you are a burden. These are very common feelings – especially for those of us who are used to providing the help
rather than asking for it.
Research Based Resources by The Gottman Insititute
The Gottman Institute has many research-based resources for couples, including:
- Small Things Often Podcast: Researched based tips to improve your relationship in 5 minutes or less
- The Marriage Minute: “It’s a resource of tools, articles, videos, exercises, and more, all founded on Drs. John and Julie Gottman’s four decades of research and clinical experience, delivered straight to your inbox.”
- Love & Relationship Blog: with a range of interesting topics.
Get to Know the “Four Horsemen” of Relationships.
These horsemen are a metaphor for four specific communication styles that can derail relationships. Get to know the Four Horsemen and their antidotes in a quick read from The Gottman Institute.
The Emotional Bank Account
This is an interesting video about the “emotional bank account” in romantic relationships, but it’s a helpful concept to consider in all of our important relationships! Essentially, we need to make positive deposits in all of our relationships, and it’s helpful to actively think about how and when we do this. Check out this quick 2-minute video to learn how to balance your “account”, if you’re interested.
Couples and Families
TIME Magazine Article Featuring Maimo Fellow
Dr. Sarah Rosenal, an MMC Cardiovascular Fellow and a graduate from our Internal Medicine residency, shares her about her COVID19 experiences with TIME Magazine.
She talks about the emotional toll of working with these patients and her steadfast motivation to continue doing the work, despite the challenges. I am certain that her words will resonate with many of you.
It is also a nice reminder to consider your own professional values and why you’ve chosen your specific career path. Those values can serve as a much needed anchor during these uncertain times.
Online Storybooks and Materials
Below are a few online storybooks about COVID-19, written by mental health experts. They can help kids to understand and cope with the pandemic in an age-appropriate way.
The Social Story Center helps explain complex events in a kid friendly way by Dr. Shu-Chen Jenny Yen
An animated COVID-19 social story for young children, in multiple languages. Read More Here